The trip to the beach
by ProtoAssassin
Summary: The assassins decide to go to the beach.
1. Chapter 1

" So were we going ?" Desmond asked when he entered Shaun's minivan.

" The beach." Lucy awnsered.

" Wait why are you wishpering ?" Desmond asked.

Rebeca pointed him to the back of the car. There was Altair sitting at the back row. Desmond got the deal. Altair did not know where they where going.  
>The next thing Desmond noted was the number of people stuffed in the mini.<br>There was Malik next to Altair, and next to Malik was Altairs fiance Maria.  
>In the middle row, there was Ezio, Rebeca, Leonardo and Shaun. Lucy was at the wheel of the car.<p>

"Get in." Shaun yelled " Its getting stuffy in here. The sooner you get in here, the sooner we get 'there'."

Desmond noted that Shaun was careful and avoided the word 'beach'. So Desmond got in the car, and they were off to the bea... Well you get it.

" So which bea.. one are we going ?" Shaun asked.

" That we need to decide." Lucy awnsered.

" Lets go to the southern coas... one." Desmond slyly said.

" The nudist one ?" Shaun remarked in his usual snotty British accent "What are yo_"

" Desmond you naughty boy." Rebeca interupted " To eager to see Lucy ?"

Desmond was devastated by Rebeca's 'remark'. Lucy blushed while looking at Desmond.

" I see you also got some of my genes . I tought you well." Ezio chuckled.

" So thats why Desmond got the front seat." Shaun complained." Hey Lucy let me sit there and i'll bang you up anytime you want."

" Shut the fuck up Shaun." Lucy shot back.

By now Altair had fallen asleep, and Malik, Maria, Leonardo and Ezio were enjoying the fight between the modern assassins. It took a back-slap from Malik to shut Shaun up.

" So I'm the bad guy now ?" Shaun mumbled.  
>" I thought I told you to shut up Shaun."<p>

" Lucy keep your eyes on the road." Rebeca shouted.  
>They almost hit a truck, but thanks to Rebeca; Lucy swerved the car. Luckily most of the people fell asleep and the rest of the journey was uneventful. Desmond and Lucy continously eyed each other while Rebeca watched. " I wish i had a boyfriend like desmond." Rebeca spoke.<p>

" Go to sleep becca."  
>" And miss out all the action ?"<p>

Luckily they reached the beach within an hour.

" Where are we ?" Altair asked as Malik poked to wake him up.

" Look outside." Malik awnsered.  
>Altair looked outside and saw the beach. He Suddenly appeared pale. He had fainted. Then peed himself.<p>

It was gonna be a long day for Altair.

Thanks for reading. All reveiws are welcome. 


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter 2

Since Altair wet himself in the last chapter, he looked himself in the room of some motel near the beach. He 'borrowed' a pair of swiming trunks from Shaun.

MEANWHILE

" I wonder were I kept those trunks." Shaun wondered.

Desmond, Lucy were already in the water. Mailk, Leonardo and Ezio were having a race to see who could get fastest from the lighthouse to the lifegaurd's whatchout.

" Are you coming or not ?" asked Rebeca.

" I cant find my swiming trunks."

" Who cares where they are. You dont need them anyway." said Rebeca in a joking tone.

" What do you mean."

" I thought you dont have a dick, Shaun."

Shaun was aghast at Rebeca's last line. " Fine you go ahead." Shaun told to to Rebeca. Rebeca on the other hand was quite happy at this.

Shaun looked at the beach, Lucy and Desmond were playing in the sand. Ezio, Malik and Leonardo were having some contest. Rebeca was cheering them along.  
>Leonardo seemed to have a disadvantage keepin up with the two assassins. Atlast Shaun thought about chcking out what Altair was up to.<p>

MEANWHILE

" Altair can we go to the beach ?" asked Maria

" No."

" Altair can we go to the beach ?"

" No."

" Altair can we go to the beach now ?"

"NO."

" Can we go now ?"

" WHICH PART OF NO DONT YOU UNDERSTAND BITCH ?"

Maria started crying. Altair never told her that he was hydrophobic.  
>It seemed to him that his fear would turn her off. Since he was gomma Marry her in a couple of months, now seemed a good time to tell her.<p>

" Maria, theres something I need to say."

" What do you want , you selfish bastard ?"

" There's something I never told you."

" OHMYGOD OHMYGOD OHMYGOD YOUR GAY ARENT YOU ?"

" NOOOO.."

" Then what ?"

====[ FLASHBACK ]===

Desmond was still a baby back then, Ezio was a three and Altair was Four.

" Altair, hold Desmond. I need to take care of something." Al Mualim told his son.

" Hey Desmond, when you grow up, you can run around and stab people ... Yes you can , yes you can." Altair told while holding his little brother.

Out of nowhere Ezio appeared with a nerf gun and shot Altair with it.

" WHAT THE _" Altair was startled. Then it happened. Desmond suddenly peed on altair without warning.

===[ END OF FLASHBACK ]===

" And thats why I'm afraid of water." Altair sulked while Maria cuddeled up next to him.

" You big baby." Maria teased. Altair looked away. " After i'm done with you. you'll only be scared of me." Maria continued. then she kissed him.

MEANWHILE

Shaun was tired of searching for Altair. Then he saw Altairs clothes hung outsid of a motel for drying. As he turned the doorknob and entered Altair's room.

" Hey Altair you ready to g_. OHMYGOD OHMYGOD OHMYGOD"

Then Shaun fainted. Maria was lying naked on top of Altair naked. Shaun had walked into the room while they were having se_ "fun".

THATS IT FOR THIS CHAPTER . HOPE YOU ENJOYED IT. JUST CLICK THE REVIEW BUTTON AND TELL ME WHAT YOU THINK 


	3. Chapter 3

Chapter 3

The assassin's came back to the beach the next week.  
>This time, Altair was more than ready. Desmond and Ezio had spent the entire week getting rid of Altair's fear of water and teaching him how to swim.<p>

" You ready Altair ?" asked Desmond

" Ready as I'll ever be Des." came the reply from an eager Altair.  
>" OK Altair, on the count of three." came from Lucy.<p>

" One_ ." Lucy was interupted

" THREE " shouted Ezio as he threw Altair into the foamy sea.

As anyone who is reading this fic would have expected, Altair almost drowned. He shwallowed 10 gallons of salty water, a goldfish, some more water, a condom and a half eaten corndog.

" Well, now that you cant swim, maybe the rest of us can go have some fun." Shaun bitched as always.

" I was not ready."

" Well you probably never will." Ezio coldly said.

" One of these days i will be able to swim." muttered Altair

It seemed that Altair had lost faith in his aquatic abilities. Then the unexpected happened.

" I'm gonna give another try."

" Oh Altair." said Maria with a wierd glow in her eyes.  
>" Its for our future Maria."<p>

Altair stood next to the sea. It was just him and the sea. For the first and only time in one of my fics , there is a quite and serious atmosphere.  
>The fear of failing, the fear of losing, the fear of getting wedgies from Ezio.<br>It was to much for Altair, He let go of his stiff body and took a step.  
>Then he became stiff again. With all the thoughts in his mind, Altair didnt see the 40 foot wave that was approaching him .<p>

" Altair, get out of the way." someone shouted.

" Wha_ DAMNIT..."

" Somebody save him ." Maria shouted

The wave broke on Altair, engulfing him in the waves. Then when the wave passed, there lied Altair in a puddle of water.

" Altair" someone shouted again.

Altair came to realization. He was floating on a 2 foot deep puddle.

" I CAN SWIM MOTHAFUCKA I CAN SWIM " shouted Altair

" When the rest of the assassins saw Altair's "swiming" they couldnt help but grin.

" Well brother, it seems that you can swim." declared Ezio

" YOU BET YOUR ASS , I CAN SWIM." xame the reply

Ezio and Desmond picked up Altair and threw him into the ocean. And like always Altair drowned like a stone only to wake up in Maria's lap a couple of hours later.

" Was that a dream ?" Altair asked himself.

Little did he know that his " dream" was cought on camera and would come to bug him for the rest of his life.

How did you like this? Please please please please please review. Nobody seems to care enough to let the author know how they felt reading the story. So please review 


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